AlbeeThere is much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving, and I continue to be humbled by your support of this crazy, little FMLA blog. I am entirely grateful for your willingness to read and ponder my continued FMLA ramblings.

I offer this in honor of the season: For those who attended my FMLA webinar on November 13 on FMLA red flags and trends, you were tortured with my rendition of “Albuquerque Turkey,” which is a beloved Thanksgiving song in the Nowak household. Oddly, I have received a number of requests for the audio and lyrics to this rendition [ahem, I am in utter shock by any level of interest].

For those willing to be tortured again, you can access the audio here.  Thanks to my wife, Shannon, who was a huge help in changing up the lyrics for my FMLA version, which goes something like this:

Albuquerque is a Turkey
And he’s feathered
And he’s fine,
And he wobbles
And he hobbles
But he asks for too much leave time.

He cries his back hurts
He claims his head hurts
Oh poor Albee it’s just an act,
You love playing hooky
It’s just an excuse, and that’s a fact.

Oh, he wobbles
And he hobbles
And he texts me that same day . . .
Claiming heartache
Crying tummy ache
Staying home to rest, so he will say.

Wednesday morning
I was surfing
Facebook posts
And Twitter, too,
On my newsfeed
I spotted Albee
On the beach
Drinking a brew.

“You’re not home!
You’ve been lying!”
“No, my boss,
I’m home for sure!”
That guy on Facebook
Was my twin
He ruins my life
I just can’t win.

Oh, he wobbles
And he hobbles
And he lies to me once more
I can’t keep him
On my payroll
I shake his hand
Show him the door

Now my Albuquerque Turkey
Is legitimately home in bed
‘Cause now back at the office
We have a new employee instead.

I wish you all the very best for a Happy Thanksgiving!